I’ve come to find about myself that one of the many talents the Lord has blessed me with is the ability to remember. And to remember well. Now if you know me well at all, you’re probably thinking I seem so forgetful in the everyday material things. And you would be correct! When it comes to remembering my chapstick or my sunglasses or some insignificant piece of material, I’m at a terrible loss. But the long term, and rather important, events from my past, I can recall quite well. I can remember all the little details about each tiny random moment of my life, both good and bad. Every vivid image of what was. And this can seem like a wonderful thing, however at times it can be quite defeating rather than a gift.
A dear friend recently reminded me of the perks and pitfalls of have time to yourself to be left in your thoughts. It seems so easy to fall into those thoughts of doubt. Those thoughts of “what if?” and “why?” and “why not?” all those self-depricating ideas that so naturally slip into our stream of thoughts as we find ourselves in the quiet moments we have to ponder life and the moments we have left behind. Seeing every flaw in yourself, or what you could have done better. What could have been different. In an ideal world however, in these moments of thought, you would want to be filled with the good things. The best things. To be overflowing in the memories of how pivotal each moment we have experienced has been in shaping who we are. And to be thankful for those experiences….
This past weekend I drove to Atlanta for a friend from high school’s wedding and it gave me a lot of opportunity to think. It gave me a lot of time to ponder the happenings of my life. And to attempt to take a proactive approach to giving thanks for all that He has blessed my journey with and submit to His purpose for my life. One thing that I noticed along the way was that the road that I traveled, 65 to 85, from Mobile to Atlanta in a sense represented my journey in reverse for the past 15 years of my life. Starting from Atlanta and ending in Mobile. And yet it represents more than that. It represents all the points along the way that got me from an lost little girl searching for who she was in elementary school to a grown woman happily married with a thriving career.
Leaving Mobile, a place I call home that is beginning to finally feel like a home. The place of my first “big girl” job and the place where my husband and I have started our lives together. On the way, passing Tallassee, where I spent many, many hours for my practicum for grad school and completling my capstone. Soon enough passing the exit for one of my most favorite places on earth: the loveliest village on the plains. My beloved Auburn. Home of Auburn University. A place where most people spend the shortest years of their life during their time in college, but the place where I’ve spent almost the longest in any one city. The multitude of memories that come from this exit alone could fill an entire book. And maybe one day it will. It is the place where I did my undergraduate work. The place where I earned my master’s degree. The place where I met some of my very best friends. The place where I found my identity, my faith, and my future. The place where I met my husband and where he proposed. The place where I was surrounded by such an incredible community of friendships and was encouraged to grow because of it. Of course continuing that journey from Auburn to Atlanta. A trip I took so many as a freshman. Visiting high school friends and traveling home for that first Thanksgiving and Christmas while I was away. It represents 5th grade. Meeting friends for the first time in the basement of the old old house, and that friendship and the community that spurred from that friendship that endures today. The place where some of the mot crucial turning points in my life occurred.
Cruising along I came to wonder just how many memories can be conjured from a stretch of black asphalt? It’s comforting to me to realize that I wouldn’t be where I am today without this road. Without this journey. And it’s just a reminder that this life is a journey. From point A to point B. and to point C. And D. And so on until that final goal is realized and that final place is reached. Until it is complete.
