Learning to Grieve - Simply Elliott

As with everything in life, we tend to move through the years in a flourish of seasons. For us, this fall and winter has been a season of loss. Family and friends have been taken from this life, and while in the midst of expected and sudden deaths we find ourselves full of tears, we also feel a sense of purpose and push to give of all of who we are in the brevity of our time on this planet. We are learning to grieve & questioning why. But mostly, we are thankful for a God that weeps with us in the midst of this loss, despite our disbelief and lack of understanding.

“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accept it. I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.” ― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

During this season I have begun a series of questions and reflections that are constantly filling my ever inquisitive mind. Of how we respond and react to everything we come into contact with. How the way we react to life changes when we lose something. That life goes on, yes, as it must, but it is forever changed. The way we interact with it changes. Would you walk the same if you lost a leg? No. But you would walk again, with the aid of something new no doubt, but despite replacements you will never again replace the flesh that was lost. There will always be a sense of lacking lingering within your life, despite the joy that permeates this new chapter of your story.

“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing. At other times it feels like being mildly drunk, or concussed. There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take in what anyone says. Or perhaps, hard to want to take it in. It is so uninteresting. Yet I want the others to be about me. I dread the moments when the house is empty. If only they would talk to one another and not to me.” ― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

Such is the same when we lose the flesh and bones that accompanied us as dear and treasured friends and family in this life. In their absence, how we react to life changes. How we react to other people changes. That person knew how to pull certain attributes out of certain people. Certain events will never be the same because they are gone. Certain relationships will never be same because they are gone. Because you knew them at all, you will never be the same because they are gone.

As the seasons change and new life begins, the memory of what was lost drives us to be better. To be better at loving one another, for knowledge rather than fear, that one day we won’t have the opportunity to pour out and cover those we love with His compassion and love. To freely give of our time and our energy to build the Kingdom. To live our lives so as to impact those around us with an everlasting impression of compassion, humility, generosity, loyalty, and joy. To be Christ to a world in need and use every moment to radiate His love.

How will you spend today, knowing that tomorrow is very well not promised?